Maybe it is not for me

I want someone to love me,
not just for a while like I've seen.
To never leave a stone unturned,
For something I believe.
I wait to hear the answers,
I wanted my whole life.
Like forever isn't long enough,
for you to be my wife.
I lie awake and wonder,
if all of this will come.
If I am just nieve about it,
and acting very dumb.
I want someone to hold me,
very tight and not let go.
Not someone who just thinks of our love,
as bump along the road.
I thought I had found these things,
many times before.
But I was just a mindless pawn,
until they slammed the door.
I want these things so badly,
that my heart aches each day.
I am beginning to think it won't happen,
it is not meant for me that way.
When you heart has been thrown around,
like mine has so much.
You tend to loose the way to love,
and get caught up in all the lust.
One day it will come,
I keep telling myself.
But deep down I truly know,
with love I'll never have the wealth.

Blondie